Monday, December 23, 2013

Is Everyone In America Dreaming Of A White Anglo Saxon Santa Claus?

It may be Fox News’ agenda du jour this Yuletide Season, but does everyone in the United States currently dreaming of a white Anglo Saxon Santa Claus? 

By: Ringo Bones 

Maybe Fox News’ Megyn Kelly has been pissed off since seeing that African American Santa Claus in that 1987 music video Christmas in Hollis by Run DMC, but does Megyn Kelly really have an erudite case for keeping the traditional Santa Claus a white Anglo Saxon (and preferably a Protestant) one? Sadly, history as we know it is not on Megyn Kelly’s side. 

Back in the darkest days of the American Civil War, the Commander-in-Chief of the American Union Forces – as in the then US President Abraham Lincoln – literally drafted Santa Claus via a famed Harper’s Weekly political cartoonist named Thomas Nast as a morale booster for the Union troops back in 1863. Given that President Lincoln also “emancipated” slaves of black African descent - shouldn’t African Americans also deserve the privilege to play the part of the traditional Santa Claus during the Yuletide Season? 

And what about the Klingon Santa Claus - Or the openly gay Santa Claus that’s born out of the increasingly politically correct decade of the 1990s? What does Fox News’ Megyn Kelly think about them? Maybe it is about as improbably as her white Anglo Saxon Protestant American Jesus Christ that she prays to. 

Tuesday, December 10, 2013

Child Advocates’ Beef Over Santa Claus Military Jet Escort: Groundless?

Maybe it is their ignorance of the actual origins of Santa Claus but are the child advocates’ beef over military jets escorting Santa Claus’ reindeer on the latest NORAD tracking animation groundless?

By: Ringo Bones 

It may be just a coincidence that the present incarnation of Santa Claus makes him appear to be a version of Ibn Battuta with supernatural powers but in actuality, Santa has military origins and had began life as a morale booster for the then US President Abraham Lincoln’s Union troops at the height of the American Civil War. Political cartoonist Thomas Nast was originally commissioned by Lincoln to create a cartoon that could boost the morale of the Union soldiers caught in the quagmire of the frontlines of the American Civil War. 

Given that for all intents and purposes Santa Claus is an American Civil War veteran – the only one left in fact that’s still doing goodwill missions on an annual basis, a military jet escort is just par of the course. A NORAD spokesperson said in a press conference that the military jet escort on this year’s Santa Claus circumpolar tracking animation was meant to give it an “operational feel”, it seems that child advocate groups appalled by the over-militarization of Santa Claus might be clueless on the American Civil War origins of Santa Claus. And before NORAD’s Cheyenne Mountain complex was even built, the United States Air force were probably escorting Santa’s reindeer sleigh with F-86 Sabers during the mid 1950s – back when the Saber was the most advanced military jet in the USAF arsenal. By the way, NORAD had been tracking Santa Claus during the past 59 years.